Friday, July 9, 2010

One Week Ago Today...

at 8:00 a.m on a Friday morning...
a Dr. walked into my room,
looked at a few pictures of my brain on a computer screen,
turned around and looked at me quietly for a moment,
before saying
"You already know, don't you"?
Yes, I knew.
I have MS...had suspected it for a few weeks...
and now this doctor was giving me the confirmation he thought I needed...
but I needed none.
God had already told me...
maybe so I could be prepared,
maybe so I could prepare others...
in any case, I knew


There...I have been wanting...and needing to say this for a whole week now.
It isn't the end of the world...
so don't feel sorry for me...
just pray for me.
Don't forget about me...
If I can't answer a phone call, letter or email right away,
I won't.
But you are NOT bothering me.
Just pray for me.

Because I am 46 (okay, 47 in a month;)
I have a lot to do in life...
and a lot of people I want to share it with...
so just please  pray.
I think it is important to share my story...
~for my precious, beautiful girls and my wonderful husband
who are on this journey that we never thought we would take together.
~for my family, who love me and care for me and should know my story.
~for the wonderful friends I have met and some I have never met...
but who make me feel loved and who are praying for all of us...
~for all the others who have MS or another disease,
or who know of someone who does and would like a friend or someone to encourage them
along the way...
I have to share my story.

When I start, I will post it here on my blog and will also
have a special tab at the top of this blog directing others to the post.
 I know that many come to blogs to laugh, be inspired, get a recipe or decorating tip...
and not necessarily to read about someone else's problems.
So...I am trying to figure out the best way to do this,
because I know I am supposed to share this...
the sweet moments...
the beautiful moments...
the funny moments...
the learning moments...
and the scary moments too.

Somewhere, somehow, I will tell the story of a so-called "Cool Mom"
(not my words, ok?;)
who thought she was doing everything right
and had her life all planned out...
until she remembered that it isn't about her plans...
but God's.

I always need to remember that my most loyal followers and readers
are my own 2 sweet girls.
I kind of think of my blog "Fairytales and Grace"
as a kind, sweet, pretty, special place.
I'm so happy that THEY love it.
Is this where I should tell my story, as well as all of the other things I
blog about?
Hmmm...
I don't know.
Obviously!!!
But I know one thing,
I have to share my story.

There are so many wonderful people in this world.
Don't ever forget it.
If you, do, call me.
I will show you my "HOPE" scrapbook,
just filled with messages from people all over the world.



And you will know that there are always people who care.
And as I have also learned,
there are people who are much worse off.
And all we can do is be there for each other,
be grateful for every little thing and every moment that we have...
and Pray!

 And to my girls...
I'm okay!
You're okay!
We are ALL going to be okay!
I can't make promises about details in the future...
but we have each other...
so we are OKAY!
I'm still the same tutu-making mom...
the same mom who wants her girls to go after their dreams...
and the same mom who wants to visit the Paris Flea Markets...
with her Shabby Chicks.

To those of you who have been praying for me...
THANK YOU!!!

I promise to break it up a bit...lighten things up...
and tomorrow is Pink Saturday!
(And by the way, my Pink post will be coming LATER on Pink Saturday, now:)

LOVE, LOVE, LOVE,
Suzanne






22 comments:

  1. Oh, Suzanne, I am so sorry! I will definitely be sending prayers your way. God bless you and your family!

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  2. Oh Suzanne Sweetie...
    I am so sorry. I just cannot believe it. One day at a time, together we will help you get through this. Just please know that I am here for you. One of my greatest joys has been coming to visit with you, and have you share with me. It has meant so much to me.

    Anytime you need a shoulder you know where to find me. God will bless this family as you have so blessed so many of us. You are one of the most beautiful Christian friends that I have. We have shared, we have laughed and we have created.

    I will be lifting you and your precious family sweet friend in prayer. We never know the paths that we are meant to walk in this life, and we are not to question why, but he sure makes it hard. Please know that you are so loved Suzanne. My heart is with you sweet friend.

    Many hugs and so much love, Sherry

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  3. I am so, so sorry to hear this. I will say a little prayer for you and your family.

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  4. Dear Sis, never would I have thought I would be reading this post (beautifully written) about you....this happens to other people, not my beautiful, vibrant sister...

    It is still hard for me to read these words and realize their impact, I can only imagine it is the same for you....kind of like a bad dream...yet one you have come to grips with really quickly!

    Already you have been such a encouragement to me, Mom and Dad,your daughters, Phil and the people you met in treatment! I know you will be the best spokesperson there ever was for MS.

    Love you Sue and will always be there for you!

    hugs and prayers

    Kathy....below is a song I was reminded of as I read your blog! It is God Will Make a Way, by Don Moen
    http://www.google.com/search?client=safari&rls=en&q=god+will+make+a+way+lyrics&ie=UTF

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  5. Suzanne, I am so sorry. I am crying with you my friend over this news. Reading your words, so many so true for me too with cancer, I feel your fears. My greatest fear is to not be here for my daughters and my husband. But you're right, there is no promise made for anyone for the future. We all must make the most of our time here on this earth with our loved ones. Please share your story with us here on your blog. I know you will help me for one, and I'm sure you will help others. And hopefully we can all help you too. We are a wonderful support group, your fellow blog-sisters. Let us share in your fears, your joys, your pain, your hopes. I will pray for you, we will all pray for you. Gather strength from all our prayers.

    Now... I want to hear all about your travel plans for Paris. I've been there, years ago, it's a beautiful city to visit. The girls will love it.
    I want to go to the Mediterranean with my husband, maybe a cruise. And... out to Napa, that will most likely be first. I'll keep you posted.
    Don't stop dreaming my friend.
    love x3 back at ya! -Sandy

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  6. I am so sorry to hear this. My uncle had MS among many other illnesses such as Lou Gehrigs. It's important to keep a positive attitude and have the love and support of family and friends. I know all you blog friends are praying for you!! I certainly am! Please keep us updated with the good and the bad and know we are here for you!

    -April

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  7. I am sorry to hear this. You are a wonderful lady and I will pray for you and your family.

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  8. Suzanne,
    I am sorry for your diagnosis but please remember that attitude is everything and I think you have just that attitude!!
    Everyday is a gift, no matter what it may bring.
    You will always be in my thoughts and in my prayers!!
    Hugs,
    Debbie

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  9. My dear Suzanne, I'm so sorry to reply so late and SO sorry to hear the news! My dear Suzanne, of course I pray for you, I pray that G-d sends you all the best and a lot of stregth. Sometimes we can't understand, but there are things that happen to us for a special reason... for a good one even, we just don't know why. And for everyone of us, you too, we don't know if our future will be easy or difficult. We have to pray and trust G-d that it will be good. I do. You are very corageous, you have a really strong attitude, this is a gift. Never forget this even if there might be difficult moments.
    I will be there to read your story. All the very best!
    Chani

    PS: I needed some time for myself without emails and blogs, that's why I've been away... You know why. I'm a little bit better. Next week I will spend in Switzerland. It will help a lot seeing my parents again.

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  10. I'm sorry Suzanne, life sure throws us curves. I have know several people with MS that have not progressed. Let's hope and pray that is the same for you. My DIL has MG, like MS, sorry I don't know how to spell it correctly. She was diagnosed several years ago. Since then she has had two babies and no reoccurances. SO PRAYERS FOR SURE. ((((hugs))))

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  11. Suzanne,

    I'm so sorry to hear of your diagnosis. Years ago when my mother was diagnosed it seemed as though a death sentence, but yet, Mom had other plans. She fought a long battle and, in my opinion, won. It wasn't always easy, but her courage helped her through and so she stayed strong for years and did what she wanted to not letting MS take her life from her.

    My prayers are with you and your family, but you are also receiving my positive thoughts for your future. Bless you.

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  12. Sending prayers for you and your family Suzanne. God belss.

    Mary Ellen

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  13. Sweet Suzanne - I am so sorry :-( Thank you for telling us so we can pray and yes, we want to hear about your journey so do share! May God be glorified in your life as you shine brightly. You are beautiful.
    Much Love,
    Courtney

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  14. Dear Sweet Suzanne,
    I think you are totally right- you were meant to write about this! I am so sorry you and your lovely family have this journey to take together, but deep down I just know that you will all be alright. You are in the right place- in God's loving hands and hearing you say that lets me know that He has a strong purpose to give a strong loving woman like you this challenge. I think you will be helping many others heal their hearts and renew their faith just by reading your words in days and months to come. You are a gifted writer, and I will hold you in prayer and sparkles and online hugs! We all will.
    And don't you worry about folks wanting light fun things on blogs. The light in your heart and words are enormous, and the real juicy joy of life is taking it ALL in, joy and sorrow, fear and hope, and thru it all LOVE- the only true thing that ever really matters anyway. Your faith will be a beacon I am sure, to give us all a reminder of just what is real, and truly precious. I would be honored to take the journey with you.
    Sparkly Hugs, Love and Pixie Dust,

    Tobi and the Pixies!

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  15. Oh my sweet friend, I am so sorry to know you got this diagnosis, but it is NOT a death sentence. Too many out there are the unlucky recipient of MS and you will get to know your body so well and all the things you must do and we will all PRAY without ceasing for you. I am so sorry I have not been able to be of support to you and since Jake was killed I have been in and out of sanity and I am glad I visited you this morning as I've missed you. You are a strong woman and so loved. There will be so many changes in your life but I just know you will be OK. Love you sister, Mollye

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  16. precious suzanne
    you have been in my prayers DAILY since i recieved your comment on my blog last week. i apologize, i wanted to get back to you earlier.

    you need to tell your story
    & i pray you feel the peace as your words flow from your heart, whether on a good day full of tutus and pink bliss or on a day when your heart is heavy.

    i am so sorry to hear of the ms. i am so sorry. i pray your body just rises above this. i pray HE who can do immeasureably more than we could ever ask for fills you with peace that passes all understanding.

    i heard one of the most powerful sermons i've ever heard last night. i just checked & its not up on line yet, but probably will be later today. i'll send you the link. it is so encouraging.

    much love to you sweet girl
    you bless me
    i pray you receive blessings 10 fold
    xo

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  17. Not going to start by saying I'm sorry - though I dont know you, I have followed your posts for some time - YOUR a STRONG postive women~
    Time to take it one day at a time for a bit but live and enjoy your life - dont let MS control you :)
    sending you tons of postive energy and prayers
    Nancy
    BrookPark OH

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  18. Not going to start by saying I'm sorry - though I dont know you, I have followed your posts for some time - YOUR a STRONG postive women~
    Time to take it one day at a time for a bit but live and enjoy your life - dont let MS control you :)
    sending you tons of postive energy and prayers
    Nancy
    BrookPark OH

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  19. Oh Suzanne...sweetpea I am so sorry what I am reading here! This is such a shock!
    I can't believe my eyes!
    I will keep you and your family in my prayers! You are a strong faithful lady and you know that God will give you the strength you need to deal with this.
    I am here for your girlfriend...anytime you need a shoulder or to scream and shout I am here!
    Please don't ever forget that!
    Suz I am so sorry!
    I don't know what else to say!

    Yes keep the blog filled with your ups and downs, you happys and sads...that is what life is all about! No ones life is perfect and you have this whole blogland standing beside you for moral support!

    Luvs ya girlfriend!
    XXOO
    Dolly

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  20. Hi Suzanne,
    I know you told me that you had posted about this, but I didn't see it until today....
    I don't know why this is happening, but I am praying that the Lord works through your life as you tell your story and inspire others...I am praying for you every day and for your family. May the Lord bless you and keep you in His care.

    Love and hugs,
    Cindy

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  21. Oh Suzanne,,,, what awful news to receive,,,,but what a very inspiring story,,,I am in awe of how you are taking it,, the Lord really has his Hands on you,, I can read it loud and clear in your word,,,,, my Prayers are with you and your family as you go through this chapter in your God Bless you all,

    Hugs;
    Alaura

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  22. Yeah! I can get in! :o) Thanks for your sweet words SuzyQ You are special to me too. And tell your hubby I feel his pain when I hear those four words "I have a plan" as well...LOL JIM

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